For some people, recognizing when someone is interested in them romantically comes easily. For others, not so much. Those who can’t tell whether or not they’re more than just friends can spend a long time in the “friend zone.” They usually find themselves labeled as the”good guy” or the “nice girl.” Sadly, many men and women spend their time chasing people who aren’t romantically into them – and the experience can be painful. When you feel like you’re not enough, or that you can’t become more than friends with someone you really like, it’s frustrating. So how do you know that you are in the friendzone? Here are some tell-tale signs to watch out for-
They Call You “Cute” or “Adorable”
If your love interest talks to you like they would their puppy, they’re probably not interested in you the way you are in them. No matter how dressed up or sexy you look, they only say that you are “cute.” Especially if you hear them talk about other people with words like “hot” or “sexy,” this can be a sign that they don’t look at you that way. You might even feel a pang every time they refer to you as “adorable.” If this sounds familiar, there’s a strong possibility that you’re trapped in the friend zone.
They Compliment Your “Friendship”
An obvious way to know if you’ve been friend-zoned to pay attention to when they say the keyword friend. If your crush refers to you explicitly as their friend when introducing you or talking about you, that’s probably what you are to them. If they go out of their way to tell you directly that you’re a great friend, it could also be their way of telling you that you’re in the friend zone. When this starts to happen, you should either make your move or decide that you’re okay settling for a friendship.
They Don’t Like to Be Seen WithYou in Public
When a guy and a girl are out together, others tend to assume that they are dating. If you’re grabbing a bite or catching a movie, anyone you see will start to get an idea—and your crush knows that. They might feel embarrassed to go out alone with you, or they will tell you that they prefer to hang out at home. Test the waters to see if your crush will go out on an actual date with you. If they try their best to avoid giving people the wrong idea, it’s a sign that they don’t want to be more than friends.
They’ve Never Made a Move
If you suspect that you’re in the friend zone, pay close attention to your crush’s behavior toward you. Do they seem interested in you in that way? If they have never made a move, you might think that they’re just shy – when in reality, they’re just not interested in you like that. They could be trying to avoid any situation that will send you mixed signals about the status of your friendship. Just because you want to date somebody doesn’t mean that they want to date you too.
They Don’t Make an Effort
This is a sure sign that you’ve been friend-zoned. If your crush doesn’t put any effort into their appearance or behavior when you hang out, they’re probably not interested. If they were interested, they would put their best foot forward. If they leave their house messy, don’t get ready, wear sweatpants, or never doll themselves up, it’s because they feel comfortable around you—comfort they wouldn’t feel if you were a love interest. Not putting in any effort is a sure sign that they don’t care how you see them. And if they don’t care about whether you find them attractive or not, you’re in the friend zone.
They Don’t Want to Talk Late at night
If your crush ignores your texts or makes excuses whenever you try to connect with them late in the evening or night, they probably aren’t interested in you romantically. They might tell you that they have plans or that they’re tired. If it’s night time and your crush never makes time for you, you probably are just a friend to them. If you were their crush, they would prioritize texting you back. And if they did miss a call or text, they would come up with a good excuse as to why – and pursue a conversation when they are available.
They Tell You About Their Crushes
If you’re interested in someone, you don’t talk to them about the competition. If you think another person is attractive, your crush is the last person you should bring it up to. That’s because you don’t want to jeopardize your chance of a relationship with someone you really like. So, if your crush openly tells you about a person they really like, you’re definitely in the friend zone.
You’re Their Go-To Person
If your crush acts more like your best friend, you know that you are their ‘go-to’ person. They will come to you with both good and bad news – and ask you when they need help. This is a sign that you’ve been friend-zoned. Being “just a friend” can really sting – especially when you’ve fallen for them, hoping to be something more. If they see you as their friend, they might even ask for relationship advice – and that can hurt even more.
They Say You’d Look Good with Someone Else
If your crush tries to set you up with someone, they’re not interested in dating you. They may also say something along the lines of, “You would look so good with … so and so.” If they want you to be with someone else, they obviously don’t feel the same way about you as you do about them. This indicates that you’re stuck in the friendzone—and probably never leaving. It’s a subtle way for them to tell you to move on. It’s not uncommon to fall for someone who isn’t interested romantically. It can be tragic and unpleasant – causing complicated emotions that are difficult to address. Once you assume the label of “just a friend,” it’s unlikely that things will change.
At that point, it’s usually too late for your crush to see you as anything more than a friend. If you suspect that you’re stuck in the friendzone and hope for a chance to get out of it, you should either make a move or talk to your crush about it to see how they feel. So, are you in the friend zone?